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Banker: noun – a
chiseller, selfish user, cheat, liar, destroyer of worlds, wanker (of course),
greedy pig, money worshipper, materialist, …. I’m sure you can add your own to
this list of synonyms; please do.
‘The banker promised to do the best he could for the
customer but discovered that this would be inconvenient for him, so helped
himself instead.’
‘Counting his customers’ money, the banker decided he had more
right to it than the lawful owners, so devised sophisticated methods to rob
them of it.’
‘Advising his customer to take out the low interest
mortgage, because it was cheaper than that offered by the opposition, the
banker smiled as he slapped on an unjustified and swingeing handling fee that
was mentioned only within the fourth paragraph of the nineteenth page of the
small print.’
‘The customer didn’t want or need Payment Protection
Insurance, but the banker included it in the loan anyway, knowing that most
customers would either not notice or be too lazy or intimidated to demand its
removal.’
‘When I asked the banker whether the Payment Protection
Insurance would apply at once in the event of redundancy or sickness, she
assured me this was the case. However, when I was made redundant a short while
later, I learned that the PPI would not become effective until I had been out
of work for 6 months.’
‘The banker promised the government that he would lend
money, at reasonable rates, to any viable small business that applied for it,
but he made the process so difficult and costly that very few felt it was worth
their while.’
‘When bonus time came around, the banker decided that normal
rules - requiring some evidence of achievement, success or extraordinary effort
to serve his customers – would not apply to those in the banking industry, so
they paid everyone above a certain level of seniority excessive sums regardless
of performance, and all the bankers were happy.’
I know this is an extra; but, hearing the news about mortgage lending schemes with small print and excessive handling charges, I just had to have my say.
2 comments:
The banker had worked hard all his life and he had at last achieved his ambition - to make such a dog's breakfast of his work as the bank's CEO that they gave him a £2million payoff.
Thanks for your contribution, Avril. Bonus on its way.
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